Is Healing Possible…
Healing is defined as, “the process of making or becoming sound or healthy again.” We all think healing is the ultimate long-term goal whenever we are faced with trauma, tragedy or injury. We are working towards that end goal and everything we do is supposed to help us heal.
So many times in the process of grieving, healing seems like a lofty and unachievable goal. Grief is definitely not something that comes with a step-by-step guide of what to follow to allow healing to happen and that can be debilitating and make the process seem overwhelming. I’m sure you’ve faced those people (like I have) who seem to expect you to be “healed” after a certain time frame. After six and a half years, I truly believe that healing is possible, but it may not be in the same ways that others or society expects healing to look like.
You see, grief changes you. The loss you faced changed your perspectives, relationships, life, faith and pretty much every other area in your life. It has made you a different person, so being what we considered “healed” is not simply achieving a certain end goal or perspective. Healing is so much more than being “sound or healthy again.” I believe that healing is allowing the pain we have been through to not define us, but instead to refine, stretch and grow us.
I tell people that I speak with daily, that my grief is not something that defines me, but it does impact me everyday. It impacts the decisions I make, how I look at the blessing of each new day and how I choose to not take for granted the time I have with the people around me. I choose everyday to allow my hurting to help others. I choose to get up and face the day, even when I’m sad or missing my husband, and try to love those around me in a way that I often failed to do before he died.
Recently, I had the opportunity to reflect back on my journey of grief for a speaking opportunity. As I went back to the darkest times of this journey, I realized how far God has brought me in my healing. It was quite an emotional time of reflection. For some, it may look like those emotions mean that I’m not “healed,” but I’m choosing to believe that my healing journey will never be a complete process. Instead, healing is a daily journey of facing each new day as it comes, sharing, loving and allowing God to put people in my path who I can help through my hurting. In Isaiah 40:29, it says that “He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.” We do not face this journey alone or by our own strength.
So as you are facing each new day in your grief journey, don’t just strive to be “healed,” instead allow our amazing Heavenly Father to help you face each new day and allow Him to work in and through you to help those around you. Healing is possible, it just may not be in the way you or those around you may think it should happen. Use that hurt to help and love the people that He puts in your path today and remember you are never, ever alone!
Amy Woody brings her personal experience and passion for helping others to her work with widows. She wants you to never forget you have a purpose and a God-given calling placed on your life, no matter what you've been through! Use your hurt to help others!